Pardon My Grief - Still Standing Magazine

Closure.  A concept that I think I subscribed to in my pre-loss days, although I'm not sure how vehemently.  Closure, a concept that has been prescribed to me by many since James died & I have come to completely rebuff.  I knew loss before James died, but the concept of closure still seemed worthy enough to accept.  But after, well there can never be a time when I can walk away from the empty chair at my table, missing loot bag at our parties, missing T-ball & school pictures on the mantle, missing laughter in our play.

As I have begun volunteering for our local Pregnancy and Infant loss network providing parent support to those new to this journey, the concept of closure re-emerges.  Hearing the the rambling cries of anger and despair in these loss mamas, tears the heart.  I am still shocked to be almost 2.5 year into this journey, feels like forever, but when I write the number it doesn't seem so long at all.  And closure, well, when I travel from this earth to my beautiful son waiting for me at the golden gates & see his face again & feel the weight of his body in my arms, I will have closure.

See an incredible piece of writing and a clip by a genius woman talking about the concept of closure below.    She experienced the still birth of her daughter  I found this inspirational, relateable and insightful.  Completely worth the time it takes to read & watch!

Pardon My Grief - Still Standing Magazine

Missed you at Ewan's birthday party this weekend sweet boy.  Love you, xoxo Mommy