Funny how this journey changes the flavours of life. Before, when I heard of those fighting illness, I spewed hope, hope that they person would be well & most of the time I believed it would be true. Today, the sick child I spoke of a few posts ago was confirmed to be fighting a life & death battle with cancer. My immediate gut reaction, hope. Hope that he would not lose his battle, not be one of the 10% whose cancer doesn't go into remission, that don't recover.
The family has asked for positive thoughts, prayers. Those I have in abundance, but I am almost positive that my prayers & hopes and wishes are a different flavour then others. While others will pray for health, I will pray for death to stay away. I know they sound close, maybe even close enough to those how haven't walked this path to not notice the difference, but I notice. I remember being one "them", only in this situation I feel like I have an advantage, I am painfully aware that this fight isn't even and that he can lose. My prayer for him is to kick the cancer's ass & death's ass in the process, my prayer for his family is that they never have to walk this path. My pledge is that should they find themselves walking it, I will walk with them.
In the mean time, loving & relishing my living children with gratitude to have them.
Prayers for Gabriel tonight.